


Yesterday won't let go. Every day, every day, every minute

by darkchild



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-07
Updated: 2015-08-07
Packaged: 2018-04-13 09:53:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,346
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4517406
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darkchild/pseuds/darkchild
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Everyone is staring at her and she doesn't seem to care. That's what makes her stand out to him.</p><p>Or the one where Rumple loses his memory instead of Belle (There is no cure, bare with me) and she pines for him and he does the same. Set in Rumple's POV until the next installment.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Yesterday won't let go. Every day, every day, every minute

**Author's Note:**

> This is one of my favorite stories I have ever written. I didn't know where I wanted to go with this story for a good portion of the writing, and that held me back. Just image Belle as Avril Lavigne in her Girlfriend album and you'll be fine.

He first sees her when she's sitting on the ground across the street. As far as first glances go, she's beautiful. She's got her headphones in and a book open in her lap. Anytime Mr. Gold doesn't have a customer, he's watching her. He looks back after three customers come in only to see her jamming out. Hair flying everywhere, book tossed aside. Everyone is looking at her and yet she doesn't seem to care. That's what makes her stand out to him. 

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

It's been days of this mystery girl camping out in the same spot only to leave after lunchtime. He's gotten in a new shipment of electric guitars and he picks them up one by one to take to the display window. He's focused on not looking at the girl and succeeds until he places the last guitar in the window. Looking up, he sees the girl staring across the way. Her face is a mix of awe and hatred. He hopes only one of those is towards him. 

He ventures back to his chair behind the counter when he looks up again to see the girl walking towards his store. He tries to keep his beating heart in check by taking out a watch and cleaning it even though he already did it yesterday. 

When the Bell jingles he still doesn't look up. He's too afraid too, thinks she might have caught him staring. "How much for your Iron Label?" He jumped out of his skin at her voice but caught himself before anything embarrassing could happen. He smoothly stands up, placing his hands on the counter for support. He finally looks down at her and sees that he might be taking too long to answer. "$729.95" Her face drops instantly. She absentmindedly plays with a loose strand on her jacket sleeve. After a while she looked to the electric guitar in question before looking back up at him. "Would you maybe take a payment plan every month? Say $100 a month." 

She looks at him so hopefully that he doesn't know what to do. He's the town tyrant. Everybody knows that when you come to Mr. Gold's Pawn Shop you pay upfront or don't leave with anything at all. He wants to see those lips form into a smile when she gets the Iron Label but he also has a reputation to uphold. "No. The money is paid upfront or you don't get the guitar." Her face is one of sheer disappointment and he kind of wishes that he had said yes. "OK. Thanks for your time." She slowly heads back out the door. She's about halfway across the street when she turns back around and pushes the shop door back open, making it clang against the wall. "Can I at least play it? Just one song. I promise it won't get broken. I have an entire collection in my apartment and I'm always very careful. Please?" He wasn't expecting that. But since he did crush her two seconds ago, letting her play wouldn't be that bad. "Oh alright. But you better make it count. This is a one time thing, Dearie."

"Thank you! Thank you so much!" She walked over to the display case and picked up the guitar. She looked around for a chair and Gold quickly pulled another one from behind the counter. "Thank you." She said again. 

She starts to play a tune that he doesn’t know. Why would he? He’s old and outdated in the things he listens to, barely even turns on the radio anymore. Her fingers are more graceful than he would think for someone who played guitar, Her fingers moved more like a piano type of rhythm. “Do you play any other instruments?” he speaks, steeling his voice as much as he can. She stopped strumming. “Oh, you know, I pretty much play everything. Drums, Saxophone, Piano, any kind of guitar, even the Harmonica.” So that’s why she was so graceful. “You could probably pick up any instrument and learn it in a day, if you wanted to that is.” She smiled up at him and nodded her head.

“I guess I should be going. Wouldn't want to keep you from doing all your tyranting." She put the guitar back in the display window and caressed it. "I really do love this," she sighed. "One day, I'm going to buy it." She said it like a promise and it made him want to give in and give it to her. "Thanks." she said again as she exited the shop. 

He really needs to get a grip. This girl is not someone he should be obsessing over.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

The annual town festival was something that Gold hated more than anything in the world. However, he went to it because it was a great place to corner people who were late on the rent they owed him. It wasn’t even really a festival, it was more like a glorified dance that is held in the biggest building in Storybrooke. He had been sitting at the farest table from the door for at least an hour now. People were dancing and having a good time but he treated this festival like any other business arrangement. 

He had already cornered two people and threatened a cane beating until they had forked up what they owed him. He’s been nursing the same drink all night and he's just about to leave when in walks mystery girl.

She’s with Ruby and they look more like sisters than best friends. The tips of her hair were dark blue and matched the almost vintage dark blue dress she was wearing. He was having trouble breathing. Even when dressing up she always has some sort of newness about her that he’s never gotten from anyone else and it blows his mind. 

They proceed to the drink table where they both get a signature drink. He feels creepy just watching them so he busies himself with scanning around the room for more people he can scare. He looks over exactly one more time and sees the two of them on the dance floor. Just above their heads, he spots another one of his clients and stands to deal with them. 

Twenty minutes later, he's back at his table. The music changes to a slow song and he resists the urge to gag. All the couples on the dance floor morph into pairs. He feels hands on his shoulders and he looks behind him to see Mystery Girl. 

"Dance with me?" she asks. She plants herself in front of him and glues her eyes to his. "I don't even know your name. Why would I dance with you, dearie?" She throws her head back and laughs at him. "I don't know your name either, Mr.Gold." 

They have a stare down for a couple of seconds before she breaks. "I'm Belle. Belle French." She sticks out her hand and Gold just stares at it like its the most offensive thing in the world. "You don't have to be so evil looking. I know you're really just a big softie." Gold scoffs. "And how do you know that." 

"I saw it that day I came into your shop. And I'm usually right about these things." She looks so sure of herself that it gives Gold pause. She surely couldn't know him as she thought she did, not from one conversation. He decided to change the subject. 

"You changed your hair." She nods as she fingers her blue ends. "I needed a change. I'll probably get tired of it and switch to a different color in a few days" He eyes the color. "I like it." he decides. "However, I'm not going to dance with you. Sorry, but this is more of a business arrangement rather than a social gathering for me." She smiled at him. SMILED at him after he had just turned her down. 

"Have a nice day Mr.Gold." With that she turned away and flung herself into the throng of coupled people to dance on her own. He watched her for a few more seconds before getting up to leave. She was beautiful and he couldn't for the life of him understand how one person could bewitch him so greatly.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

Gold had been having a particularly bad morning. He was out of coffee, his water pressure was shot in his shower, and he was missing his favorite tie. He barely made it to his shop in order to open it on time.

Outside was gloomy and dark, like he somehow controlled the weather with his temperament. He unlocked the door to the shop and walked through, flipping on the lights as he went. His foot hit something and it slid across the floor. Pushing out an exasperated sigh, he picked it up from its place under an umbrella rack. He was going to murder someone if it ended up being another flyer asking for volunteers for the local animal shelter. 

The envelope was a light shade of purple and the outside was addressed simply to 'Mr. Gold' in swirly but elegant writing. He quickly flipped the envelope over and ripped it open to reveal a card. 

As you all already know, I'm not one for cards but my father thought it would be an 'excellent' way to invite everyone to my birthday party.

Now, on to the fun stuff! I'm thinking this year's theme should be neon. Neon paint, neon lights, neon everything. As always, the party is on June 3rd. RSVP isn't necessary as food will be supplied by an amazing friend of mine, and I can eat his food for more than a lifetime, so if no one shows then its more for me. 

Gifts are MANDATORY, people. I'm only born once, and I plan on milking it for every birthday until I die. There will be none of the terrifying gifts of last year, I'm talking to you, Ruby. Seriously, none. Zilch. 

Everybody knows that there are never rules at Belle French's parties. That being said, my golden rule of life (even though I say I have none) is to have fun. I want all of you to have fun. Dance on tables, scream at the top of your lungs, do whatever you need to. Fun is the greatest gift of life. 

Remember, it's not a party unless the cops are called. It's always for noise disturbance, but still. 

Love always,  
Belle French

Gold was drawing a blank as to why she would want him at her party. He's not fun. In fact, he tries to exclude all fun from his life. If there were a class on how to have the least amount of fun in life, he would be the teacher. 

He wavered between going and not going but there was never really any competition. He would go if it made her happy. He quickly placed the card back into the envelope and placed it on his fridge in the back with a magnet. 

It looked to be a slow day so he decided he could step out for a cup of coffee. God knows he needs it. He leaves the lights on but turns the sign to closed as he exits the shop.

When he had gotten his coffee from Granny's, he hadn't felt like going back to his shop just yet. He found himself walking towards the docks of Storybrooke. They had been closed for years, only really open during the summer time for children to swim in. 

Gold stopped to make sure he was by himself before fully walking out to the edge of the dock. He stood there looking at the cool water and how it looked like it was merging with the sky, light blue mixing in with the gloomy grey of the sky.

He's tired of standing so he moves to sit at the edge, feet hanging off. He lets his head rest against one of the wooden bollards and relaxes. 

He's only been sitting for about ten minutes when a rain drop hits him on his nose. He reluctantly shuffles to his feet. He feels just a little bit more relaxed now that he's finally had time to breathe. He chuckles at himself for the lack of eagerness to do anything. He's never felt like having a lazy day but if this is what it feels like, then he's all for it. 

Suddenly the droplets of rain that were barely falling became a downpour of epic proportions. Running was not his forté but he didn't want to get even more soaked than he already was. He picked up his pace, cane sloshing through already formed puddles on the street. 

He fumbles for his keys when he's almost to the shop door. A movement catches his eye and he looks to the left to see Ms. French standing there huddled into herself.

"What are you doing here?" he asked while jamming his keys into the door. His voice comes out harsher than what he meant for it to and he looks over at her to make sure she's alright. "I don't know. I had no where else to go. My shift at the library doesn't start until 2 and so I figured I would come look for cool things in your shop." 

The door finally gave way and he entered, making sure to hold the door for her to come through also. "I didn't know that you worked at the library. You don't peg me as the type." She cocks her head to the side and laughs at him. "Two of my favorite things are music and books. I never know which one I love most. But since there was already a music teacher here, I decided to become a library assistant."

She absentmindedly picked up the Iron Label from the first day she came in. She barely plays any notes as her fingers arrange themselves around the cords. "You can play. I mean, if you want to." Gold says to her as he moves to sit behind the glass case. She smiles up at him and it's blinding for a minute, and then she sets out to play. 

It's a slow song, something with feeling but still a light little tune. At least until she starts to sing. It morphs into something that does funny things to his heart when he hears her sing.

She stopped playing after that, looking up at him. She seemed to be lost in thought, staring into his soul, and then she moved. "Hey, want to hear a song I haven't learned to play yet?" He snorts. "Sure. Even though I don't think that you can't play it." 

She whips out her phone and seems to scroll through a billion songs before finding the one she wants. It starts out sounding like an orchestra all beautiful and haunting, and then it changes. Suddenly people are singing about bittersweet symphonies and life. 

"I can't play all of those instruments." she says as she looks at him. "I like this," Gold laments as he watches her. "It's amazing but yet has a point." 

Belle starts to smile and then something catches her eye and her smile gets bigger. Gold spins around and sees the invitation he pinned up.

"So what are you going to get me? Is it going to be something from here?" He snorts. "Like I would actually tell you." She shrugs. "You never know." Then she's staring at him again like she's definitely seeing into his soul this time and unlike last time, he really doesn't mind.

She clears her throat as she looks away. "I should be going." He doesn't want her to go but he can't very well keep her in here. She waves at him and then steps out into the rain, ducking so that it doesn't hit her in the face. It's weird that they were having what seemed to be a normal conversation and then she just bolted. It was almost time for her shift at the Library though so he figures it wasn't anything he'd done.

 

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

Gold finds himself at the entrance to Belle's apartment above the library the night of the party. Walking up to her door put a feeling in him that he could only describe as distressed. The huge box under his arm didn't make the feeling better either. 

As he made it to the top of the steps, he starts to get increasingly more jittery. He doesn't know what he's going to do when he gets to her door. Thankfully, it was already open and from the sound of it, already louder than any party he had ever attended. Walking in was like walking into a forest of neon. Every possible surface had been covered in neon paint, and the UV light brought out more color than Gold had ever seen in one place.

Leaving his present by the door, Gold went to explore. The apartment isn’t nearly big enough to hold this many people, but yet Belle didn’t want to have it anywhere else. He’s almost to the kitchen when a neon blue drink is shoved in his hand. “You made it.” came a familiar voice. It startled him for the better part of a minute until he registered that it was Belle. He had nearly walked past her since her ensemble looked different from anything he’d ever seen her in.

She wore a skin tight dress that had blue paint splatters. She had scraped her blue tips in favor of dyeing her whole head with this brighter blue, which also glowed to match her dress. The lipstick is what gets him, all blue and glowy, accentuating just how beautiful her lips really were and making him feel giddy in the fact that if she kissed him, everyone would know. He really didn’t have an excuse to be staring at her lips so much though, since the body paint she was wearing was drawing his eyes to the curve of her neck with its intricate flower pattern. He gulped as he looked to her shoes, hoping at least those were somewhat safe. Oh for the love of God. he thinks. Her shoes were at least double the heel size she usually wears and were blue as well. She was really trying to kill him. 

When he finally managed to move his eyes back to her face, she was staring at him with a knowing smile playing at the corners of her mouth. Her eyebrows crooked upwards after a few more seconds and he finally grasps that he hasn’t said anything at all to her. “Nice party.” were the first words that didn’t have anything to do with the fact that he wasn’t kissing the lipstick off of her mouth. Her smile morphed into something less lethal. “I try. I’ve always liked this rave feel to my parties.” He nodded. “No music? I thought you said it was going to be loud. Louder than this, anyway.” That seemed to shake her awake. “Hey Hatter, give us some music.” she yells loud enough that you could’ve heard it outside. The guy nods and plugs in his Ipod. Gold’s eardrums are immediately bombarded with dance music and Belle starts to tug on his arm to dance with her. He chugs the drink in his hand and allows himself to be pulled to the center of her living room. 

As soon as they get there, Belle’s got her arms wrapped around his neck and her face mere inches from his. He expects her to put some space between them since the initial contact has them close enough to feel each other’s breath on their faces, but she doesn’t. He doesn’t know where to place his hands in a way that won’t feel like he’s touching pure skin where her dress fits tightly around her small frame but eventually settles on putting them at her waist. He looks into her eyes and gets zinged with the electricity rolling between them. She leans closer to him and he feels like he could die right there from the sheer closeness of her mouth to his ear. It takes him a minute to focus on what she’s saying. “Do you usually dance with the birthday girls at their parties?” Gold snorts as he leans over to her ear. “Just you.” he tells her simply. She seems pleased with his answer as she lies her head on his shoulder. His fingers clench on her waist and it causes her to move her hips until they’re pressed together all the way and barely doing any dancing at all. 

He feels her body shake and looks down to see her laughing. “What?” She presses her smile into his shoulder. “It’s just that we would be the pair that slow dances to rave music.” “As I recall, it was completely opposite from our town function last month.” he laughs out. “You were the only one without a partner and dancing like some of these people are.” She seems to find that even funnier. “It seems I was.” Gold looks around at all the bodies around them that seem to move as one. “Do you want to dance like them? You’d have to teach me, but I’m a fast learner.” That makes her laugh harder as she looks up into his face. “I couldn’t actually imagine you dancing like they are. Besides, I actually do like slow dancing.” Looking around one last time at the amount of jumping and crazy leg movements going on, he had to agree with her.

The drink he had must have been really strong because that all too familiar flush is spreading across his cheeks and he’s only had one of those florescent drinks. The drink definitely must be working its way into his system since he seems to have been absentmindedly running his hands slowly up Belle’s waist and back down again for a few minutes, or at least he hopes its as little time as possible. Either way, Belle hasn’t said anything to him about it. “Have I told you happy birthday yet?” he asks before clearing his throat. Her eyes find his and she shakes her head no. “Happy birthday, dearie.” he smiles. She doesn’t look away from his gaze and he finds that both comforting and uneasy. 

A tap on his shoulder reminds him that there are other people in the room. Backing off a bit, Gold turns around to see a man that he doesn’t know. “Think I could have a turn, mate? You’ve had her for basically the whole set.” He turns to Belle, a question in his eyes. She doesn’t seem to want to but she nods to the guy anyway. “I’ll come find you again later. Playing hostess means dancing with other people.” He nods his head and forces himself to remove his hands from her waist. The other guy outstretches his hand and Belle takes it. He tries to curb the jealousy that burns in his body and fails. “The name’s Will.” he hears him say before their off mingling into the crowd. Gold turns on his heels to get a drink from the kitchen.

He’s been at the party for maybe an hour and a half and he needs fresh air. Standing from his place on the sofa, he makes his way to the fire escape he saw earlier. The smell of cigarette smoke hits him in the face as soon as he sticks his head out. Belle stood on the farest part of the escape, her back turned toward him. The puff of smoke he sees means that it wasn’t just someone who had lit up and went back to the party. “I didn’t know you smoked.” he states as he climbs fully out of the window. Looking over her shoulder, she shrugs. “I didn’t use to. I didn’t used to do a lot of things.” Gold finds himself so close to her that he could reach out and take the cigarette away from her, wants to even. He has this uncontrollable urge to berate her for being so careless with her health, but knows that it isn’t his place to. He doesn’t even know why he feels that way at all. 

“I thought you were playing hostess.” Her lips wrap around the cigarette before she blows out a layer of smoke. He gets distracted at the blue ring that’s left behind. “I was. Until the guy that stole me away from you got a little too handsy. He was way too drunk, that one.” Gold’s hands clench on the railing just a little too hard. “Did he hurt you?” he growled out. Belle seems taken aback that it even seems to bother him at all. “I’m fine, everything's fine. Hatter kicked him out for me and all he did was grab my wrist a little too hard so that I wouldn’t walk away from him.” Gold grabs both of her wrists to inspect them, causing her to drop the dreadful cancer stick. The sigh of relief Gold lets out is loud enough for both of them to hear after he finds nothing wrong with her. “I thought I was going to have to kill someone tonight.” Belle brushed her shoulder against his. “You looked like you wanted to, but there’s no need for the feared Mr. Gold to come out tonight.” 

They stay silent for a little while, both looking out at the town. “What did you mean when you said you didn’t used to do a lot of things?” Turning her back so that its on the rail, her face seemed to close itself off at the question. She bites her lip.

“You don’t have to answer.” She looks over at him and smiles. Blowing out a puff of air, she turns herself towards him. “I didn’t used to do all of this,” She gestures to herself and all around them. "I used to be this quiet girl who read books and didn't cause a scene everywhere she went." He wasn't following. "You still read all the time though. Not that I knew how much you read back then." Belle runs her fingers through her hair. "Yeah, but it was different because you did. I was different back when we-" Just then, a head pops through the window. "Do you want to do presents now or later?" Ruby asks. The question has Belle moving towards the window without a second glance. "Yeah. Yeah, I'm coming." 

Gold is left standing there wondering what the hell she had even been talking about. Belle had talked to him like they used to know each other and he definitely would have remembered if they had. He heard the music turn off and figured he should go round up his gift. 

When he retrieves his gift from the door, he quickly catches a seat on the couch so he isn’t left standing. Belle sits on a table that’s to his left and people start handing their gifts to her. He tries to pay attention but his mind keeps wandering back to what she had told him out on the balcony. It was like he was only getting part of the conversation and was expected to know the other half. Christ, this girl was really getting to him. And he hates that. Hates it more than anything because he’s allowing her to have this much purchase over him. But he desperately loves it too. The fact that he almost killed that guy for semi hurting her is enough to make him realize that this isn’t some harmless crush anymore, it’s gotten much more serious in his mind. 

He watches as the last person gives her their gift before standing to give his own. “Oh, this one’s big. I like that.” He already knows that she’ll like it. When Belle opens it and realises what it is, her face melts into the biggest and brightest smile that he’s ever seen on her. She takes the Iron Label out of its box and runs her fingers down the neck. “I couldn’t very well not give it to you. You’d never be able to afford it on a Librarian’s salary.” She chuckles at him and she jumps up into his arms. She smacks a kiss onto his cheek and lets her head drop onto his shoulder. “Thank you. But don’t think you’re getting rid of me that easily because I’m just going to find something else that’s unaffordable to me and badger you until I get that as a birthday present too.”

“You know, you don’t need a reason to step by the shop. Sometimes company is good." Belle giggles and smacks his arm. "Is the big bad Mr. Gold telling me that he likes my company? Because it definitely sounds like it." 

"Oh for the love of God, get a room." came the cry of someone in the crowd. "Maybe someday we will." Belle shouts back at them. She turns to peck him on the other cheek and then giggles as she grabs his hand. "Let's dance." Gold isn't having much luck with telling her no and eventually just follows her. The music starts back up and she’s all over him again. All arms and eyes. He tries to school his expression into something more of a scowl just in case she thinks he really enjoys this.

“When are you going to realize that the big bad attitude isn’t going to work on me?” Gold shrugs and hopes it says something like “I don’t care if you can see right through me. I just want to make sure nobody else can.” What he really says is something more along the lines of “When you stop pretending that the attitude isn’t part of the reasons that keep you coming back around.” And that’s good because he sounds more sure of himself than he’s ever been around her and she hasn’t killed him yet. Belle actually doesn’t seem to mind what he said, likes it even. “Are you really so sure that I like it? Because that’s an awfully huge statement for someone who beats people with canes and hasn’t flirted with anyone in town.” 

So people have been talking about him. “You don’t run away from me when I’m anywhere near you so that’s a start.” Belle’s smirk is like no other he’s ever seen and it disarms him of any other thing he might have been about to say to her. “Doesn’t mean I like what you do. I’m just more apt to see the good in people rather than letting people tell me what everyone knows.” 

 

And if that isn’t the best and worst thing she could have possibly said, he didn’t know what was. She knows it too, because the smirk is back full force. She leans her head on his shoulder as she looks up into his face. “Can I ask you another question?” He nods. Of course he nods. Her face is closer to his by mere inches but close enough to feel her breath on his face. “Why haven’t you kissed me yet? I’ve been trying to get you to all night and yet here I am, still definitely unkissed.” The question leaves him tongue tied and unable to do anything but stare at her. They stand frozen for a minute or two before Belle surges forward and locks her lips with his. 

The contact is like all the air he’ll ever need and for a moment, he thinks about what it would be like to have her like this. To have her wrapped up in his arms and in his bed. He knows he can’t, though. Knows that she could be kidnapped or killed as leverage against him. That thought alone has him stopping his lips from devouring the soft lips under his. Belle’s lips aren’t letting that slide. With a growl, she fists her hands in his hair and deepens the kiss. He lets out a growl of his own and lets one of his hands grasp her face. Pushing her hair out of the way, he moves his lips down to her neck. “Jesus..” Belle gasps out. Now it’s his turn to smirk, and he does. Gold’s lips travel from her neck back to the corner of her mouth. “Why did we wait to do this? I forgot.” He pulls back to hear her answer and Belle chases her mouth after his. “I don’t know.” she purrs. The sound of that alone has him fisting his hands in her hair and pulling her lips back to his, consequences be damned. Belle lets out a sharp cry of surprise when he bites her lower lip and sucks it into his mouth. She retaliates by walking them back against the wall behind him. That won’t do though because she’s going to be the one trapped with nowhere to go as he takes her apart. He flips them and places his hands back onto her hips. 

The clearing of a throat has them both pulling apart from each other in an instant. He watches as the well kissed look on Belle’s face morphs into something more closed off. He looks over his shoulder to see Ruby there with a very angry face on. “Are you crazy? I thought we agreed.” She pulls Belle towards the kitchen by her arm. “See you.” Belle says, turning back to him.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

It’s been three days since Gold’s even laid eyes on Belle. She’s not at any of her normal places and is always gone the few times he actually does gather up enough courage to go down to the library.He doesn’t know what all might have happened between her and Ruby, but it's unlike her to be M.I.A. 

He doesn’t know what else he could do so he does the only thing he knows how, he uses magic. Pulling out the magic mirror, he waves his hand over the clouded mirror. “Show me Belle French.” What he expects is to see her out having fun like she always does. What he actually gets is Belle wrapped up in blankets, tears rolling down her face and head lying in Ruby’s lap. “I know it’s hard,” she tells Belle. “But it’s not fair to you if he doesn’t remember who he is. You are the bravest person I have ever known, but you can’t let this break you. You said you could handle coming back from town and we all agreed. We just don’t want to see you hurt anymore.” 

Gold doesn’t understand at all what’s being said. The look on Belle’s face is enough to make him see that it’s a big issue for them both. “I just want it back the way it was,” Belle sniffles. “I just want Rumple back. I want lazy saturday mornings with him reading the paper and me reading a book curled up on the couch. I want him to remember me-” Her tears are falling so much that she doesn’t even finish and Gold doesn’t even know how she knows his name. 

The guy from Belle’s party comes into view as Belle sits up to take the tea he has in his hand. “We’ve tried everything, Belle. You know as well as we do that magic isn’t going to fix this. True loves kiss didn’t even faze him, Belle. I don’t know what he needs to remember you.”

Belle slowly takes a sip of her tea. “I need to tell him.” Jefferson and Ruby’s eyes snap towards her. “I don’t know what else to do.I just know that I can’t not love him anymore.” Belle stands. “Are you sure this is going to work? Are you this is what you want to do?” Belle wipes the tears from her eyes and runs her fingers through her hair. “I don’t know but I need to do this, I need to show him what we had.” 

Gold waves his hand back over the mirror to skewer the image before him. He doesn’t know what she’s even talking about. Her words imply that they once were a couple and he doesn’t know how to deal with that. He surely would have remembered if they ever had gotten into a relationship. Belle French isn’t someone you could ever forget, and he definitely wouldn’t be forgetting that kiss anytime soon. His mind is reeling. He supposes that she’ll come to speak to him about it when she’s ready. He pours himself so Whiskey and waits.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

When she walks through the doors of his shop, her face is more determined rather than sorrowful like it had been in the mirror. She marches right up to him, grabs him by the face, and kisses him so roughly that he almost thought he would have blood from where their teeth clashed together. After a while, she pulls away. “We need to talk.” He nods to her and motions to chairs he has behind the counter. “What I’m about to tell you is something that you might not understand but you need to know that I’m telling the truth. I don’t know what else to do with you so I’m just going to tell you what really happened.” 

They sit facing each other and Belle lets out a slow breath before looking him in the eye. “Rumplestiltskin, you are my true love. We met in the Enchanted Forest after my father summoned you to save our Kingdom from the Ogre war. The Dark One was and still is a powerful source, even if you don’t see yourself as you used to be. You told my father that you would help if you could have me to be your house maid and clean up after you. He didn’t agree, but I told him that I would do it if it saved our people.” Belle pauses to pour herself a glass of Whiskey that he still has laid out on top of the table. After taking a long swig, she continues.

“You would never admit it to me, but we fell in love about the same time. You let me go town one day thinking that I wouldn’t come back. Regina, she put this idea in my head that you were in need of saving and told me that if we really loved each other, True Love’s Kiss could break any spell that you might be under. I came back a few hours later and kissed you.” She leans down and grabs her bag that she stuffed under her feet. “You were still very much in love with your power and thought I did it because nobody could ever love you, that I just wanted your power. You went into a blind rage and threw me into the dungeon and trashed your entire house. When you finally let me out, you told me to leave and never come back. And so I did, I went off and had some adventures.” She digs into her bag and comes up with a cloth covered bundle. She twirls it in her hand as she continues to speak.”

“When I decided to come back, Regina captured me and placed me in her prison. About the same time, you and Regina enacted the curse that sent us here. I spent the twenty five years before Emma broke the curse in an asylum. I eventually got out but I didn’t remember who I was and Jefferson told me to make my way to you. You thought I was dead. Apparently Regina told you I had jumped off of a tower after you turned me out because I was tarnished for having spent so much time with you. When I did remember, the look on your face was worth all of the pain I had been through. I hope that’s the look I’ll get when you finally remember.” 

“If I remembered then, why can’t I remember now?” Gold asks. He doesn’t know what to feel. He just feels numb, like he’s discovered this entirely new side of him that he never knew existed. “There was a curse placed on the town line and you accidently crossed over it. Nobody could leave because they forgot who they were. They reverted back to who they were before the curse broke. With you it was different, It left your life the way it was but erased me.” 

“We tried everything to get you to remember me, but nothing worked. I was a mess. I couldn’t do anything. Everyone in town knows that you're my true love and nobody ever found out a way to help get you back to me. They were all so sympathetic and I couldn’t take that either. I hated them. So, I ended up using magic to build a house that only Jefferson and Ruby know about. I’ve stayed there for three years. Three years, Rumple. I don’t even know how you got through the twenty five, because I want to die right now.” Belle’s face is streaked with tears by the time she’s done. He doesn’t like that so he stands and wipes her tears away with his thumbs. “Stop it. Not until you remember, Rumple. It hurts too much.” 

She lets out a ragged breath. “I wanted to change everything about myself because it reminded me of what we used to be. I wanted a new me with new hobbies. So I posed as someone entirely different from the Belle you used to know so that I wouldn’t have to worry about doing something that might remind me of you. It obviously didn’t work. Jefferson and Ruby only let me come back because they thought I would be strong enough to see you without breaking. I’m not that strong, so that was yet another bad decision that I’ve made.” She stands as she unwrappes the object in her hand. “This cup was what you kept all of those years. I figured you might be able to remember if you had it.”

“Belle, I want to remember. I really do. I just don’t know what you’re talking about.” She places the cup into his hand. “Just think on it tonight.” With that she turns to leave.

Rumple stays up extra long that night to ponder what she had said. He never stops touching the cup the whole time. He falls asleep that night with the cup cradled under his pillow, hoping for Belle’s sake that he remembers. 

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

Gold wakes with a jerk. Pictures are flashing before his mind’s eye faster than he can grasp them. He rolls over to flip on the light and his hand hits the cup. The jolt that it sends to his mind is welcomed because the pictures are slowing down now. He sees pictures of Belle, her head thrown back laughing. Her hair pulled up in a ponytail as he she flips over on her stomach to read a book. Her face when she finally remembered who she was. He runs his finger over the chipped part of the cup lip and remembers how she dropped it. He remembers everything she told him last night and can see it all vividly, like they had had the conversation already. 

Gold’s out of bed faster than he’s ever been and barely slips on a robe and shoes before heading to Belle’s apartment. When he gets there, he bangs on her door.

“Belle, open up.” He bangs on the door again. “Belle, dammit, I need to see you.” He hears shuffling and then there stands Belle looking all cute and sleepy. He’s pushing into her house before he knows what he’s even doing. He kisses her like he’s drowning. “Dammit, I remember. Belle, I remember.” And then there’s tears on his lips as she cries. “I love you. Don’t ever do that to me again.”

He nods as he places his hands on either side of her face. “I promise.”


End file.
